'Will always grieve': Mandira Bedi on late husband Raj Kaushal
What's the story
In her first public discussion since the untimely death of her husband, Raj Kaushal on June 30, 2021, actor-television presenter Mandira Bedi has shared her experience of grief and loss.
Speaking to Humans of Bombay, she revealed that she has now processed the loss to a degree that allows her to speak about it publicly.
Kaushal, known for directing films such as Pyaar Mein Kabhi Kabhi and Shaadi Ka Laddoo, died of a heart attack at age 50.
Emotional struggles
'The first year was very, very, very, very hard...'
Bedi described the first year after Kaushal's death as the most challenging.
"The only way out is through. Of course, my children and I think of him every day. It's not like we've forgotten him. The first year was very, very, very, very hard."
"The first of everything is just impossible to deal with. The first birthday, the first anniversary...The second one is a little bit easier, the third one is a little bit easier..."
Healing process
Bedi discussed coping mechanisms post husband's demise
Bedi shared that she found solace in work as a way to cope with her husband's death.
"There are moments when we remember him because of a song. I've done the therapy I've needed to...there are times I still do it," she expressed.
"What I can do now is talk about it...It makes me emotional, but I can. I started working two months after it happened...I've to support my family and myself. I need to do it for my children."
Emotional triggers
'His car, Kishore Kumar's music': Bedi revealed lingering emotional triggers
Despite having processed much of her grief, Bedi admitted there are still things she finds difficult following Kaushal's death.
"It's been six years that I've had his car. And I have to sell it now. I'd been holding onto it for emotional reasons...I'm going to shed a tear when it goes," she confessed.
Furthermore, she revealed a particular trigger: "One thing I still can't do, is that I can't listen to Kishore Kumar's music."
Relationship brief
Bedi and Kaushal married after three years of dating
For those unaware, Bedi and Kaushal tied the knot in February 1999, following nearly three years of dating.
After 12 years of marriage, they welcomed a son, named Vir and later adopted a daughter, Tara, in 2020.
A versatile figure, Kaushal was a producer, and director, and had initiated an advertising agency in 1998.
Notably, before his passing, Kaushal had reportedly suffered from a heart attack in his 30s as well.